Susangalique (susangalique) wrote,

It was a rough meeting that I suffered today. When I found out about it this morning I got completely hysterical and nearly hyperventilated. I called my friend at Auburn who calmed me down and talked me up, reminding me that although my institution does not think much of me I have done great things and my colleagues through out the state appreciate me. I guess it was just nice that he tried to build me up from feeling like a piece of shit.

Jody sent me some nationwide links to jobs but I don't want to move. I want to move jobs but I don't want to move.

I can't go on like this much longer. Aaron thinks I should persue council but I wouldnt even know what to say. My brain is so fried I cant think. He wants to know specifics about the meeting. I already cant remember it and I feel light headed.

It statred with talking about me comunicating that I feel like I cant talk to HR or to The branch manager and I had joked that my last meeting with them gave me post tramatic stress so I run when I see them. I guess I did say that jokingly. The branch manager asked me about it and wanted to know why. I said becuase bad things happen to me when I see her.

Then there was a string of questions I refused to answer regarding the suicide meeting.

They wanted to know if I could do the conservation part of my job and I told them I just sent several days wiping mold off pictures. She said why was it not reflected in my bi weekly email. I said its just part of the job.

I will have to keep thinking so I might remember.
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